Brenda Rivas| Flourish Your Brilliance

For me, Valentine’s Day has always been about chocolate, flowers and lot’s of love and tender affection for others.  This year it was still about that, but for the first time ever,  it was also about love towards ME!

My life has evolved and shifted at what  seems like a very rapid pace. I spent  many years not really liking and much less loving myself.  Limiting childhood programming were a major source of my self loathing.  I simply did not feel that I deserved a good life.  Although it all looked great from the outside looking in, the reality was that  inside I was negative. Trapped between feelings of low self worth but subtle energies of impending greatness. Sound familiar?

In the last couple of weeks, I have had a few people ask how did I make the shift in my life?

The truth is that it all started with making the decision to love myself, as I am, unconditionally and to forgive myself for all of the years that I did not.  It was also about changing my thought patterns.  Doing the inner work by uncovering my limiting beliefs and replacing them with new empowering beliefs.  I am worthy of great things in my life NOW….not later. 

A remarkable thing happens when you make a quantum shift.   You start to evaluate everything in your life from a different perspective….your relationships with loved ones, with money, your enviroment, etc.  When you heal and move through insecurities and self-doubt, organically, you uplevel everything about yourself. 

It seems like the moment that I made the inner shift of self love, forgiveness and acceptance, circumstances, opportunities and breakthroughs started to flow very quickly.  No coinsidence there!

So….how are you keeping yourself small?  What do you need to shift within yourself so that you too can step into your purpose? Sometimes it just takes a nudge from a source outside of ourselves to create the forward momemtum necessary to create a breakthrough.  Well…I just lovingly nudged YOU!

Happy Valentines Day!

If you’re feeling like some area of your life isn’t moving forward fast enough, I urge you to just take a minute and try out the following process.
Bring to mind the situation that feels stagnate or stressful. Identify what exactly isn’t working. Make sure to look at all aspects. What part are you responsible for generating? What piece are other people creating? What outside forces are messing with your mojo and flow?

Once you’ve pinpointed the sticking points, now pinpoint how you’d like to see this area of your life. Remember to pretend you have a magic wand and can experience any end result you desire.

For instance, Sammy is not getting along with his wife. They seem to argue over the same topics every day. He finds himself not wanting to go home. He doesn’t know how to correct the problem and feels like he just has to live in this misery.

I took him through the two steps above, and he discovered that his wife is not truly the cause of his misery. He actually didn’t like the way he responded to his wife’s complaints about money and her co-workers.

Ideally, Sammy wants to create intimacy with his wife, and he would love for her to find a new job or career that is fulfilling. He would also love to support her in a way that feels easy and that she appreciates.

Once you have created clarity about what is not working and how you’d like it to be, you can make a decision. Decide how you want to feel moving forward. Is there an action you need to take to create some relief? [...]

This week I’m including an article I wrote two years ago when I was struggling financially.  At the time, as I studied money and wealth consciousness, I began to recognize that as women, none of us feel comfortable admitting that — at least in part — we’re “in it for the money,” because that’s without soul, right?  And we’re soulful people!  But there is absolutely no shame in wanting to support yourself and your family, to earn enough money to live comfortably and to help you achieve your goals. Because chances are that what you want is what your fellow women want as well….

So many women live in lack, and particularly financial lack. And most women have a lot of self-imposed limitations, issues and money stories that keep them from fully showing up in life. That keep them from really giving of their passions and gifts. That keep them from being who they most authentically are.
And this kind of lack mentality leads to depression, it leads to disease, it leads to over eating it leads to playing small and it leads to miserable lives and worries, fears and stress.
And the worst part of all is that it not only affects the one individual woman being overworked, stressed, depressed, over-eating and bummed out, but it affects all of the people who would ordinarily be blessed by her work and her showing up large in life. And for a woman to show up large in life, she needs a lot of money.
And I know this can be a very controversial subject, particularly for any of us in any form of a spiritual community. And that’s part of the bridge that I want to build here. Because it’s been this melding and blending of my own faith and spirituality with my passions and gifts of life coaching and empowering women that changed my financial circumstances. [...]

Being an entrepreneur and starting your own business is probably one of the most exhilarating things that a person can do and at the same time one of the most revealing. 

 Exhilarating because this is your own creation.  You imagined it, you nurture it, you feed it your time and energy, and you watch it grow in to a magnificent company that reflects your greatest dreams and desires. 

 Revealing because it will bring forth to your attention those areas in your life where you are stuck, have resistance, and/or feelings of limitations.  These are known as limiting beliefs and can be the factors of whether your business will be the phenomenal success that you envision or not. 

 Limiting beliefs have always been present in your life, but you have ignored them or tried to explain them away by blaming them on someone else or other circumstances.  Now you have your own business, you are responsible for this business’ success, and you have no where and no one else to transfer the lack of success.

 An example of a limiting belief is the hesitancy to ask for money for your product or service.  Before when you were working in corporate environment, the excuse could have been that your manager didn’t appreciate you or recognize your value when all along you just needed to ask for the raise.  Your underlying belief that it is wrong to ask for money kept you from asking for the raise and presenting and seeing yourself in a way that justified it. [...]

I received a beautiful handbook after a silent retreat I attended last year that asked the simple question: What is the most important thing in your life? The book went on to say that the best way to determine this for yourself is to ask: When you are not thinking of completing a task at hand, what does your mind revert back to?

I encourage you to ask yourself that question now before reading on.

Got your answer?

Okay great.

Now onto the Truth: What is predominately on your mind is a reflection of what is in your heart.

And, you may find, what is predominately on your mind may be very different than what you would write down – or *think* in your head & heart. [...]

If you are anything like me, the minute that I step into the shower I start to get a flood of ideas!  Sometimes great business ideas and other times ideas about life in general.  You could say that 90% of my life epiphanys have been hatched in the shower!

The funniest part is that I am realizing more and more that there many people that also experience this very same {phenomenon}.  What is it with water and ideas?  When the idea is red hot,  I will {lovingly} yell at one of my kids to bring me a piece of paper and a pencil.  No, they don’t question why mom needs paper in pencil in the bathroom anymore, they know that mom is simply writting down yet another brilliant idea!  As a recent Coaching Graduate, my girlfriend Angela gifted me some amazing bath soaps from Lafco.  I found myself taking three showers in one day! It was part combination of wanting to enjoy the bath soaps and part combination of birthing a new program idea.  My husband was giving me odd looks!

Just recently while I was surffing the net, guess what I found?  Yep, Aqua Notes,  a waterproof pencil and paper set for the shower. Well, I guess there goes my idea of creating a shower paper and pad set!   And yes, I did place an order!  I will let you know if it’s worth the investment!  By the way be sure to check out my new course that starts on November 11th, “ Creating Money ”.  Of course, it was created in my shower!

While many business-owners have difficulty delegating work, at a certain point it becomes necessary to move the business forward. Hiring an assistant can help you run things more efficiently, letting you focus on the big picture as your assistant takes care of administrative tasks. Some companies hire admins to work on-site, but many others are using virtual assistants to take care of tasks like scheduling or invoicing remotely.

Here are five signs that you need an assistant.

1.    You forget to perform tasks like updating your website or confirming appointments. Sure, the world keeps turning even if your website hasn’t been updated or a few appointments get missed. But think how much better off your business could be if you didn’t have to think about these tasks or feel guilty for forgetting them! An assistant can easily be trained to help with marketing or scheduling so that these business functions always happen when they should.

2.    You waste time looking for lost documents or emails. In addition to your time spent performing menial tasks, losing an invoice or accidently deleting an email costs you even more time! If you’re so frazzled that this happens on a regular basis, then it’s time to hire help. An assistant will ensure that you stay on top of invoicing and filing so that you don’t miss payments or make costly administrative mistakes.

3.    You don’t have time to see family or friends. Every entrepreneur needs some downtime to relax and recharge. Spending time with family and friends is a great way to do this, so if you find yourself skipping out on brunches or birthday parties in favor of work, then it’s probably time to reprioritize. Hiring an assistant, even one who works just a few hours a week, frees you up to focus on what matters. And having time for yourself and the people you care about will also benefit your business, because you’ll be refreshed and ready to tackle new challenges. [...]

Goals are an important way to conquer life. The roadmap of our daily journey, the blue print that shapes the direction our lives take, and the manifesto of what we want to accomplish before we leave the planet, goals concretely state our plans and allow us to start breaking our plans down into easy action steps.

There are some easy, positive goal setting techniques you can follow, to enhance your goals and turn them into reality faster. When you set yourself up for a planning session, create a quiet, serene place with music that makes you feel positive and successful, treat yourself to a nice glass of wine or some gourmet chocolates – give yourself peace and allow yourself to enjoy the process of writing our your goals!

1. Commit. Write down  your goals. Putting it on paper makes it much more tangible and allows you to better evaluate if its really a goal of yours.

2. Categorize. When you have a lot of goals, its hard to keep up. You may find yourself overly ambitious in one area of your life to the detriment of others.

3. Plan. Get out the calendar. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither will your life be. Set a completion time frame for your goal – if you’re not sure, break your goal down into smaller pieces and set yourself reasonable deadlines. Using a calendar also helps you gauge how many projects you will be attempting to deal with at a given time and give you a leg up in time management

4.Evaluate. Listen to your gut. When you write a goal, examine how your body reacts, as this is a clear indication of how you feel about it. If you clench up, reevaluate the necessity of it, or at least see if it can wait for some more fun goals.

5. Be realistic. You are not going to lose 50 pounds in a month without ending up in the hospital. Be kind to yourself and you will feel the rewards of reaching your goals!

6. Be positive. Feeling great now about your goals, and believing they are easily attainable will keep you motivated and bring you faster and lasting success. Even when your goals seem difficult or unreachable , remember to visualize yourself succeeding and know that will carry you through the hard times.

Goals motivate us through life and provide inspiration in some of the darkest hours. Goals make us human.

Long ago, a warrior was about to set his armies against a powerful foe whose men outnumbered his own. He sailed into the enemy’s country, unloaded the soldiers and equipment and gave the order to burn the ships that had carried them. Addressing his men, he said, “Do you see the boats going up in smoke? That means we cannot leave these shores alive unless we win. We now have no choice. We win, or we perish.” They won.

In Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill uses that story to illustrate his point that every person who wins in any undertaking must be willing to burn their boats behind them and cut off all avenues of retreat. Only by doing so can one be sure of maintaining “a burning desire to win.” [...]